Number Nine, Number Nine, Number Nine ...

Apple will, on the ninth of September, announce something groundbreaking. Revolutionary, with a new paradigm that shakes the market and enables the loyal Apple customer to interact with their systems in ways previously thought impossible, while new functionality due to the licensing agreement with leading bodies leads us into a new era of ...

Look, no, I can't keep it up. I don't know any more than you do what Apple's doing on the ninth, although it'd be entertaining to take the above sentence and play keyword bingo with it during the presentation. I don't think you'd get fewer than twenty direct hits.

In any case, there are all sorts of floating rumours, as there always are. It's always fun to ponder, so let's take them all on at once, shall we?

iPods with embedded cameras

It's certainly feasible, although the smaller screens on the nanos and classics could make composition tricky. On that note, the shuffle could make for some ... interesting … photos. The cost of an embedded 2-megapixel camera is embarrassingly low, given that even the cheapest and most awful camera phones ship with them.

iTunes 9 with social networking

Is it just me, or does this seem really trivial? Given that of the 65,000-odd iPhone applications out there, roughly 50,000 are twitter clients (the remaining 15,000 seem equally split between flatulence applications and flashlights), it can't be that tough to code the Twitter API. Although it does lead one to ponder: do you really want to inform the world when iTunes randomly starts playing Glenn Medeiros' "Nothing's Gonna Change My Love For You" that your friend dumped into iTunes "as a joke"?

[Yeah, a joke. That’s what it was. Sure. — MJCP]

iTunes 9 with "Blu-ray support" — whatever that means

Go and listen to MacThePodcast for this one. I think I'm all ranted out on this subject.

Time to take your tablet

A friend of mine bet me their first-born child that Apple wouldn't release a tablet product in September. As delightful as said child is, I don't actually require any more children. I do hope Apple's listening, but then I don't particularly think the tablet will rush to market, if only because all of the rumours surrounding it are so vague. It might be this size. It might be that size. It may, indeed, come with optional barbequeing implements.

Steve Jobs will appear

A Jobs-led presentation would clearly draw more headlines, and arguably be a decent spur for Apple's share price, as long as he appears to be healthy. That said, there's also an argument for not allowing Jobs to present, presuming Apple's transitioning into a period where he takes on a lesser role over time.

The one after 909

This rumour swirls around a different kind of Apple — namely Apple Corps and the tracks of a little-known bunch of Liverpudlians.

The ninth is when the back catalogue of the Beatles becomes available in re-mastered form. It's also when Beatles Rock Band becomes available across games consoles. Clearly there's a fair bit of commercial exploitation of the back catalogue going on around that time, so to say that they're going to make the same tracks available on iTunes isn't a huge stretch of the imagination.

Actually, there's an easy way to find if Apple's released anything Beatles-related on the ninth, and it doesn't involve being up at 3am to find out. If there's anything Beatles related that's genuinely new — say, a Beatles-branded iPod, or an inflatable John Lennon with every second iPod, randomly seeded — you'll be able to hear the girlish squeals of joy from MacTheMag's editor from wherever you are on the planet. And that's no rumour.

[Girlish squeals? Right, you just earned yourself The Glenn Medeiros Christmas Album, mister. — MJCP]

Got a feeling you know what's on the ninth? Say say say what you want at MacTheForum

Bookmark and Share